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  Hours of fun run away fast. Everyone is having a wonderful time and the guests seem reluctant to leave – until eventually all the little ones are too hyper to handle any more stimuli, so their parents scoop them up and take them home before the tantrums are too loud to be handled. Giselle’s just as tired, so Harry helps me with our daily routine of bath time followed by a bedtime story, and for once we have to put her down before she finishes her milk.

  We join the grown-ups for dinner, but only after we are sure she is fast asleep. When we walk into the dining room the people around the table are merry and their happy smiles make my spirit soar. Georgie and Darren are now engaged, and given the fact that she hasn’t touched the champagne in front of her yet, I’m wondering if there is more good news in the pipeline for them than just a wedding.

  Becca and her husband sit holding hands. Their three children are watching a movie in the snug as they are old enough to be up still. My dad and Albert are sitting together discussing the upcoming elections and I’m glad that over the years they warmed up to each other. Robert and his latest boyfriend, Zack, are looking at each other with an intensity that speaks of young love, and I’m really pleased to see how content everyone is.

  When my gaze lands on Harry, I entwine my fingers in my lap to stop my hands from shaking. I know it’s silly but I blush when his eyes stay on me.

  When dinner is over, Harry comes to me and takes my hand.

  ‘I have a surprise,’ he says. His words carry the same impatient tone I can see in his eyes.

  I follow him into his childhood bedroom with my heart fluttering inside my chest. I love him so much and these new feelings are supported by the affection I’ve had for him for twenty years and suddenly intensified by the love we share for Giselle.

  A few months ago, we moved in together, in the pretty house we bought in Cambridge. We decided the time for London was gone and we wanted Giselle to grow up near her two granddads. Once I decided to look into my heart and accept that my love for Harry ran much deeper than I’d ever admitted even to myself, happiness flooded into my life again.

  ‘Ready?’ he asks me, as we stand outside his room. My stomach quivers when Harry takes a step towards me. My back is gently pressed against the door. His arms are stretched around me, facing me. When I lift my eyes to him, he kisses me softly. My heart is pounding in my chest and I can’t stop the shiver that shakes me from head to toe. He smiles at how my body reacts to his touch. It wasn’t easy to push aside the weariness we both felt at the beginning, but our love is guiding us through it, at a steady pace.

  ‘I’m ready.’ I nod and smile, not sure what to expect.

  He opens the door and lets me go in first.

  The lights are dim. Candles are lit on the windowsill and on the marble mantelpiece.

  I stand still and speechless in the middle of his bedroom that has been transformed into a traveller’s caravan. The bed is covered with a patchwork quilt and floral pillows, which carry the old-fashioned carnival theme upstairs from Giselle’s party. ‘A magical place … just for the two of us,’ he says, stepping closer to me and taking my face in his hands. The kiss this time is long and romantic and full of promises.

  When I shiver again, he steps away and caresses my hair with his fingers. He takes my hand and slowly spins me around until I can see big metal letters lit up by bright, round bulbs, balancing on the wooden headboard of his bed.

  ‘Marry me.’ I read the two words spelled by them with a breathless voice.

  Harry looks at me with a nervous smile when I turn my eyes to him again.

  ‘Marry me, Francesca,’ he says and my eyes fill with tears.

  ‘I know I can never take Paul’s place in your heart. I’m not asking you to replace him, but I hope you have enough space for me as well, because I love you. I’ve always loved you and I want to spend my life with you,’ he says softly and I love him so much I just wish I could show him that my heart is full of him.

  I try to use words instead, as I’m desperate for him to know that he’s not playing second best to Paul; he never did and never will. My feelings for him are just as real, just as deep, and it’s not a compromise to marry him.

  ‘Harry,’ I whisper, taking his hands in mine, making sure I have his full attention. ‘Love multiplies and the heart expands. You had your own place in my heart for twenty years, so you don’t have to worry about replacing Paul. My feelings for you are strong and I love you.’ I can see the light of the candles dancing in his eyes. ‘I love you, Harry,’ I say again, lifting my palms to his face, ‘and I want to marry you. So, yes. Yes, I do. More than a simple yes could ever describe,’ I say to him.

  ‘I love you too,’ he answers, lowering his lips to mine.

  I smile and his face is glowing with happiness.

  If Paul will forever be the love of my past, Harry is undoubtedly the one of my future and we’ve now come full circle.

  ‘We are getting married,’ he says, holding me in his arms with a happy grin on his face.

  ‘Looks like we are,’ I answer and, leaning in to him, I lift my chin to look into his eyes.

  His kiss is painfully slow, incredibly romantic, and full of promises.

  Epilogue

  Early the next day I walk down the stony path, forcing myself not to cry.

  Today is a new day, yesterday is now firmly behind me, and tomorrow is shining ahead.

  An ancient crypt defines the boundary of the FitzRoys’ private part of the cemetery, where the family’s ancestors and their future generations lie side by side. It is my lighthouse in this foggy morning in November.

  ‘Almost there,’ I tell myself, approaching the white granite headstone.

  Before long, I’m standing in front of the newest grave, right next to Josephine’s. I look down at Paul’s photo that I left in front of his tombstone the day of his funeral a year and a half ago and I smile. Paul looks back at me with an eternal, youthful smile, which will never fade and will always live in my heart, together with the most beautiful memories.

  ‘We didn’t have the forever we wanted,’ I say, looking at his picture. ‘But the time we had was a hell of ride, a hell of a life.’ I can almost hear his voice as he agrees with me.

  I place the flowers we brought with us on Paul’s and Josephine’s graves. It’s nice to know she is there next to him, and he’ll never be alone again, and neither will she.

  Harry comes and stands at my side, carrying Giselle in his arms. She is babbling away, and when Harry kisses the tip of her nose, she giggles. They are adorable together and I know that love always finds a way to make things right, even if it’s not what we have imagined or hoped for.

  ‘Hi, Mama. Hi, Paul,’ Harry says, looking at his mother’s and his brother’s graves.

  He puts Giselle down and her tiny shoes make a soft noise with every little wobbly step she takes. I crouch down so that I’m eye to eye with her.

  ‘Shall we blow Daddy and Grandma a kiss?’ I ask her with a smile. She smiles back and presses a sloppy kiss to her palm before sending it over to Paul’s photo with a wave of her chubby little hand. Then she does the same in Josephine’s direction. Her eyes are glowing with love and my heart fills with a painful level of joy.

  ‘How much do we love them?’ I ask, squeezing her in a comforting hug, which I need much more than she does.

  ‘Loooz … Dada. Dada …’ she answers, using the only two words she knows.

  Giselle babbles enthusiastically, lifting her arms in the air to Harry, hoping that he’ll pick her up again. When he indulges her, she squeals with a pure joy only a child can express.

  ‘It’s getting cold,’ Harry says, taking my hand in his.

  ‘Let’s go home,’ I suggest, smiling at him and kissing Giselle’s cheek while she nestles contentedly in the crook of his arm.

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  Copyright

  An imprint of HarperCollinsPublishe
rs Ltd.

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  First published in Great Britain by HQ in 2018

  Copyright © Laura Danks 2018

  Laura Danks asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work.

  A catalogue record for this book is available from the British Library.

  This novel is entirely a work of fiction. The names, characters and incidents portrayed in it are the work of the author’s imagination. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or localities is entirely coincidental.

  All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. By payment of the required fees, you have been granted the non-exclusive, non-transferable right to access and read the text of this e-book on-screen. No part of this text may be reproduced, transmitted, downloaded, decompiled, reverse engineered, or stored in or introduced into any information storage and retrieval system, in any form or by any means, whether electronic or mechanical, now known or hereinafter invented, without the express written permission of HarperCollins.

  E-book Edition © February 2018 ISBN: 978-0-00-825923-5